VULNERABILITY TO BE ABUSED (EIGHT OF A SERIES)

Waiting...always having to wait

As much as I don't like to write about this, and as sad as it may sound, —as I mentioned in my previous post-https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/4038844228930111664/7626586630965434636 "LOSS OF INDEPENDENCE (SEVENTH OF A SERIES)" —, it is true: Persons of any age who have lost their independence due to disability, be it mental or physical, are vulnerable to be exposed to abuses. Be it in institutionalized care settings or in their own home.

Of course, there are different ranges and types of abuses. Some, of them, are so horrific that they will make your hair stand on end; for example, being kicked or hit, or even worse, being sexually abused.

Others are not as terrible, but still bad enough to make the disabled person realize, that she/he has lost all possibility to fend for himself.

For example, let's say that the care provider acts as if she/he does not hear what the patient is saying or asking for. Or, does things differently than asked or instructed; or, takes time and delays doing what is requested. Or, simply ignores doing it. Any of those attitudes could create an imbalance of power between the care provider and the disabled person.

Based on my own situation, I can tell you that my experiences in dealing with caregivers have taught me that in truth, things are done the way the caregiver chooses. I may lay out my instructions all I want. . . And they will execute them to their convenience.

I have not suffered any horrible abuse, but I have learned to wait, accept, adjust, take deep breaths and hold my temper, smile, and thank their attention always no matter what. In other words, to be 'the patient'! Ah, and let's not forget: be always ready to pay. Pay as much as they demand because that is the only way a disabled person can get some help. 

Living with this reality harms the disabled person's dignity and increases the feeling of helplessness, making the dependent person feel end.